Generational Struggles (or YES AND)

At the grand age of 40, I have now had quite a few years to look back at my life and realize many things. I have critiques for my parents (and realize why they did many things), critiques of the times when I grew up, the church, the politics, the clothes. Oh my, the clothes have now come back. And I am NOT here for it. I am at that place where I can look back and critique those who came before me—as well as look back at those behind me with some choice words.

I really appriciate the improv gold standard of “yes, and”. I need it in this critical of everything life. It is admitting the truth of what happened (yes), while agreeing that it wasn’t perfect and more is needed to balance/understand/clarify/continue (and). On the ends of the spectrum, a “no” ends the conversation, and yes by itself can also end the conversation (or just be unrealistic). A “But” is a risky choice—adding a negative context-but sometimes offers a needed new way or option. Unfortunately, many times it falls short of actual action and comes off as complaining.

At the grand age of 40, I need lots of “yes, ands” for when I look back on life. I also need them when I look forward at the next generation(s).

We just watched “Jesus Revolution” in theaters. It’s the story of a pastor who, at a time when so many of his generation were saying “no” to the next generation, he said “yes, and.” He opened his heart and church to invite the hippies in, to admit that the whole love of Jesus applied to them too. And today, I’m part of the fruit of that choice (those choices—because it is never only one). My home church is directly related to those leaders portrayed in that movie.

I appreciated that the movie didn’t stop with the first “yes” choices, but worked to try to explain some of the rest of the “Yes, and” choices. I think after all first joys and exhilarating highs of “yes!” It is unrealistic and unsustainable to think we imperfect people can get it all perfect and right and keep going over time: we all need to readjust and reevaluate and even repent—and that is where the “yes, and” comes in (and sometimes a “yes, but”).

I have a couple blog posts in me somewhere to talk about the “yes, ands” of the purity movement I lived through. Currently, people are talking about the Asbury revival. I think the word “Revival” is tricky and connected to a lot of different experiences all over the spectrum. We need it, we want it—we are weak people—and so we say “yes, and.” I pray for more grace and creativity and awareness to not just say “YES!” or “NO!” and end conversations around me. I pray for the wisdom and boldness to say the “yes, buts” when they are needed, and I am so grateful for all of the “yes, ands” that I get to grow into, and pass on.